Update...

no more spotting.

Thank goodness!

Not sure what caused it or what it means but I rested enough for it to not come back.

I was so scared Sunday night I went and put on one of the necklaces I wore for my 1st rainbows pregnancy.  With his I literally looked like Mr T (I think ive mentioned that before) but instead of bringing that look back, I kept it simple and wore the one that I was hoping would give me the most luck and protection.  Now I feel like if I take this off something will go wrong, since everything went back to 'normal' once I put it back on.  I know that sounds nuts, but I believe that you have to do what ever you have to do to get through this insanely SCARY process.

I was going to skip the beta for monday, but after that spotting scare I just had to do it.  I swore that the levels would be lower or messed up.  I almost didnt want to go just because I was so scared.  I had to wait until today to get those results.

The HCG was 2612, based on the calculations 1800 would have been the goal!  Progesterone was 55, and 50s seems to be the average rate its keeping which is fine by me.  When the specialist called today with them he sounded very optimistic.  I told him about the spotting and he said that it was nothing to worry about with numbers like this.  I want to add this is the same guy that gave me the results for my ovulation this month who said to "relax"...so yeah, when brown old blood is coming out of your vagina in a pregnancy, let me know if you think its 'nothing'.....0_o

He wanted to have me go in this week but I told him I preferred to wait until a heart beat would be visible.  Besides, I have an appt on Saturday with dr vajayjay and based on the dates I would only be 5w3d and therefore probably not even going to see a HB at that appointment.  If the numbers continue to raise as they have (more than doubling) I should be at 10,000+ by friday.  I seen a lot of info saying you see a HB at 6000, but in my experience with pregnancy I see one after 6w, which is next week.  So I scheduled the appointment with his office for the 28th.

I had my first dry heaving this morning and I was SO happy.  My son thought it was hysterical and literally starting chanting "My turn mommy!! My turn!!" and he runs over to the toilet, literally as I am hovering over it and pretends to puke by spitting.  I nearly peed on myself from laughter!!  I had to take a video and send it to my husband (obv not with me puking but of him reenacting)  He is one of the number 1 reasons I took the risk of ttc again.  Had I not taken it for him I dont know where I would be today, he brings so much joy to my life I never thought possible.

I pointed to my belly and asked him what was inside.  He says "baby" and then leans over and gives my belly the softest sweetest little kisses.(this was saturday)..I have NO idea why he would do that since he has never been around a pregnant person before.  I dont even know if I mentioned there was a baby in there or if he just listens to everything I say.  Even he loves pineapple already!!

In one month it is his birthday.  I cant help but wonder if I will still be pregnant at that time.  That to me is the most depressing sentence in this post.  But its a reality for us.  We have already lived through this type of nightmare, so for us to assume lightning doesnt strike twice is ridiculous.  I just keep reminding myself this time I have so much on my side.  Even more protection than before.  I just really pray it all goes the way I wish it to.

My little pineapple...I need you to keep growing and come HOME!!